“Love and kindness
are never wasted. They always make a difference. They bless the one who
receives them, and they bless you, the giver.” — Barbara de Angelis
I am intrigued by some research findings of a relatively
simple practice – that of wishing good things for yourself and for others. There
are variations on this theme: some call it a lovingkindness practice, some name
it prayer or blessing (Christian), some call it metta (Buddhist), some name it
compassion meditation.
With Valentine’s Day in just over a week, possibly you’ll
want to experiment with this loving practice explained briefly below --
Sit comfortably. Breathe gently. Recite inwardly phrases
that address this question: "What do I wish for myself and for
others?"
Some possible phrases to use (in first person to start with: we
begin with ourselves because without loving ourselves it is almost impossible
to love others) -
“May I be happy. May
I be free from suffering. May I be peaceful. May I be loved.
May my mind be
healed. May I make friends with my body.
May I have the courage to face my fears.
May I be safe. May I live with ease. May I learn to let go. May I be forgiving.
May I accept whatever comes.”
Settle on three or four phrases that express most deeply
your intention to cultivate kindness and well-wishes toward yourself and others.
Repeat these phrases silently to yourself for 5-20 minutes,
expanding - when you’re ready - to include different groups of people beyond
yourself: “May you be happy...peaceful...live with ease…” for someone to whom you feel deep gratitude, for a
beloved friend or family member, for a neutral person, for a difficult person, for
all people.
Here’s just a few of the benefits to help motivate us toward
engaging in this simple yet profound practice.
*enhanced empathy
For more:
- listen to a TED talk by Dr. Charles Raison on how compassion meditation can reduce stress, depression, and
serious illness, and cultivate compassion.
This small randomized study of 21 participants had 13 individuals
assigned to CBCT meditation (weekly training sessions and at-home practice for
8 weeks) and 8 control subjects who completed classes (on mind-body subjects like
the effects of exercise and stress on well-being).
Eight out of the 13
participants in the CBCT meditation group improved their RMET (Reading the Mind
in the Eyes Test; consists of black-and-white photographs of eye region of
people making various expressions) scores by an average of 4.6 percent, while
the control participants showed no increase, and in the majority of cases, a
decrease in correct answers for the RMET.
CBCT uses a cognitive, analytic approach designed to help
participants recognize equanimity and the interdependence of all creatures and
cultivate compassion towards others, whether family, friends, or far-flung
strangers. The comprehension of shared suffering is thought to reduce negative
emotions, like anger and resentment, and help nurture positive ones, like
kindness and gratitude.
*increase in
social connectedness
One
study done at Stanford University suggests that a short 7-minute practice of
loving-kindness meditation can increase
social connectedness.
*reduction of pain
and anger
Loving-kindness
meditation in this study has been shown to reduce pain and anger in people with chronic lower back pain.
*increases in
daily experiences of positive emotions
Researcher
Barbara Fredrickson at the University of North
Carolina at Chapel Hill concluded in this 2008 study
that loving-kindness meditation can help boost
positive emotions and well-being in life, fostering personal resources (such as:
increased mindfulness, purpose in life, social support, decreased illness
symptoms). In turn, these increments in personal resources predicted increased
life satisfaction and reduced depressive symptoms. Fredrickson's 2011 manuscript gives detailed background and results.
I haven't spent much time actually practicing this lovingkindness meditation yet, AND (rather than but) I hope to begin to do so more. Possibly you'll choose to join me in stepping into this beneficial loving discipline and feeling good (plus bringing good to our 'world') because of it.
May you feel deep love this month.
“Let
love be genuine; hate what is evil, hold fast to what is good; love one another
with mutual affections…
Live in harmony with one another…” - Romans 12:9-10, 16a
“If you want others to be happy, practice
compassion.
If you want to be happy, practice compassion.” — Dalai Lama
I am intrigued by some research findings of a relatively
simple practice – that of wishing good things for yourself and for others. There
are variations on this theme: some call it a lovingkindness practice, some name
it prayer or blessing (Christian), some call it metta (Buddhist), some name it
compassion meditation. 
Here’s just a few of the benefits to help motivate us toward
engaging in this simple yet profound practice.
Researcher
Barbara Fredrickson at the University of North
Carolina at Chapel Hill concluded in this 2008 study
that loving-kindness meditation can help boost
positive emotions and well-being in life, fostering personal resources (such as:
increased mindfulness, purpose in life, social support, decreased illness
symptoms). In turn, these increments in personal resources predicted increased
life satisfaction and reduced depressive symptoms. Fredrickson's 2011 manuscript gives detailed background and results.
