Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a
smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act
of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around. -Leo
Buscaglia, author (1924-1998)
“Lead with
your ears, follow up with your tongue…” - James 1:19a, The Message paraphrase
“Several university studies have found that people who interrupt conversations are at greater risk for heart problems. In fact, one study at Duke University found that people who interrupt are up to 7 times more likely to get heart disease! The researchers theorize that people who interrupt are excessively competitive and controlling, two hallmarks of the worst “Type A” personality traits. Now here’s the amazing part: These high-risk people can lower their risk without totally altering their personalities…and without any drugs, exercise or dietary changes. All they have to do is practice being good listeners.”
It took me many minutes – even with the powers of Google search engines – to track down the source. To my dismay the research is really old – definitely not cutting edge. Still it was a longitudinal study (22-year study of 750 white, middle-class men, published in Jan. 23 issue of the Journal of the American Psychosomatic Society, 1997) possibly worth the time to read.
Here’s what DukeHealth.org says, in an article published in 1997 and updated in 2004 (bullet points added for readability):
·
"Men who monopolize conversations, interrupt others
and excessively compete for attention -- a personality trait known as social
dominance -- have a higher rate of early
death (60 percent more likely than all the other subjects to die of any
cause) than men who have a more relaxed approach to communicating, according to
Michael Babyak…
·
Conversely, men
who spoke calmly and quietly had lower than normal rates of heart disease
and early death compared to all other personality subgroups in the study.
·
"We don't
know why this effect exists, but we theorize that socially dominant men are
more chronically aroused and stressed, so they release more of the damaging
stress hormones," said Babyak, a researcher at Duke University Medical
Center, with co-authors include Margaret A. Chesney and George Black, UCSF;
David Ragland, UC Berkeley; and Houston.
·
Babyak says that
social dominance is not the same thing as being excessively outgoing or
achievement-oriented because dominance is
driven by feelings of insecurity whereas the latter traits are driven by
self-confidence and the desire for personal fulfillment. Socially dominant
people tend to be attention-seekers who are trying to get ahead at the expense
of others and are struggling to prove their self worth."
Continuing, I read these words (still on Bottom Line Health,
without any substantiation – why don’t they provide the research link!?!)
“In one study, the test subjects focused on being silent while others talked. Result: They lowered both their blood
pressure and their stress hormone levels!
Okay,
so I wanna say: maybe it’d be good for our own health and the wellness of the
world if we listened more than we talked? Just a question to consider.
Finally
we get summer here in Minnesota, and that means time outside with neighbors and
friends, and possibly more opportunities to talk and LISTEN. If you’re curious
to learn more on listening, follow this link for 10 Tips to Effective &Active Listening Skills.
May
you enjoy listening and learning in this month of June. And may all goodness
and wellness be yours, Dee
“I like to listen. I have learnt a great deal from listening
carefully. Most people never listen.” - Ernest Hemingway
“Understand this, my beloved brethren. Let everyone be quick
to hear (a ready listener), slow to speak, slow to take offense and to get angry…” - James 1:19
