Listen up

Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around. -Leo Buscaglia, author (1924-1998)

“Lead with your ears, follow up with your tongue…” - James 1:19a, The Message paraphrase

I admit, I have a bias. I think being able to listen well is an amazing skill. So I gravitate toward the content of this blurb in a Bottom Line Health publication (a piece of advertising junk mail, really, but I’m always looking for interesting wellness tidbits). 

“Several university studies have found that people who interrupt conversations are at greater risk for heart problems. In fact, one study at Duke University found that people who interrupt are up to 7 times more likely to get heart disease! The researchers theorize that people who interrupt are excessively competitive and controlling, two hallmarks of the worst “Type A” personality traits. Now here’s the amazing part: These high-risk people can lower their risk without totally altering their personalities…and without any drugs, exercise or dietary changes. All they have to do is practice being good listeners.”

It took me many minutes – even with the powers of Google search engines – to track down the source. To my dismay the research is really old – definitely not cutting edge. Still it was a longitudinal study (22-year study of 750 white, middle-class men, published in Jan. 23 issue of the Journal of the American Psychosomatic Society, 1997) possibly worth the time to read.
Here’s what DukeHealth.org says, in an article published in 1997 and updated in 2004 (bullet points added for readability):

·         "Men who monopolize conversations, interrupt others and excessively compete for attention -- a personality trait known as social dominance -- have a higher rate of early death (60 percent more likely than all the other subjects to die of any cause) than men who have a more relaxed approach to communicating, according to Michael Babyak…

·         Conversely, men who spoke calmly and quietly had lower than normal rates of heart disease and early death compared to all other personality subgroups in the study.

·         "We don't know why this effect exists, but we theorize that socially dominant men are more chronically aroused and stressed, so they release more of the damaging stress hormones," said Babyak, a researcher at Duke University Medical Center, with co-authors include Margaret A. Chesney and George Black, UCSF; David Ragland, UC Berkeley; and Houston.

·         Babyak says that social dominance is not the same thing as being excessively outgoing or achievement-oriented because dominance is driven by feelings of insecurity whereas the latter traits are driven by self-confidence and the desire for personal fulfillment. Socially dominant people tend to be attention-seekers who are trying to get ahead at the expense of others and are struggling to prove their self worth."

Continuing, I read these words (still on Bottom Line Health, without any substantiation – why don’t they provide the research link!?!) 

“In one study, the test subjects focused on being silent while others talked. Result: They lowered both their blood pressure and their stress hormone levels!                

Okay, so I wanna say: maybe it’d be good for our own health and the wellness of the world if we listened more than we talked? Just a question to consider.

Finally we get summer here in Minnesota, and that means time outside with neighbors and friends, and possibly more opportunities to talk and LISTEN. If you’re curious to learn more on listening, follow this link for 10 Tips to Effective &Active Listening Skills.

May you enjoy listening and learning in this month of June. And may all goodness and wellness be yours, Dee

“I like to listen. I have learnt a great deal from listening carefully. Most people never listen.”  - Ernest Hemingway

“Understand this, my beloved brethren. Let everyone be quick to hear (a ready listener), slow to speak, slow to take offense and to get angry…” - James 1:19

PS: Here’s an extra, on a totally different subject ‘-) In my searching for substantiation of research on the dukehealth.org site, I came across this which supports another of my biases (with some good research to back it up) – and that is that breast milk is best! If interested, follow the link (this research is more current, Aug 2012; in brief “breast milk, but not infant formula, fosters colonies of microbiotic flora in a newborn’s intestinal tract that aid nutrient absorption and immune system development.” Yeah!).